Tuesday, 29 March 2022

March 2022 - Life moves slowly upwards.

It has been four months since I have updated my blog but the reality, not much to write about when personal priorities are elsewhere. In those months and on the positive side, family life matters have improved, thankfully on a slow upward scale but with more time and patience, we will get there, that I am sure. Since my last entry, M.R. and I have now retired, work / employment is now a thing of the past and has become history. Do either of us miss it, we let you know when we stop laughing! Just say good riddens as we start another chapter in our lives. The thing is, were are we in our ongoing book, certainly long past the mid way point but are we near the end though? 

As for general life, well Covid restrictions are now lifted and life is gradually returning to a new normal, were we start to live with the Covid virus along with the changing world too which is having an effect on everyone and it be sometime (if ever) things will calm down. May be the start of a 'new' world and not necessarily one that we may like. However, that is my serious thought were I will leave it to others to ramble on about the rights and wrongs of our confused world. Well you don’t need to read about it here when you have social media if you want the latest updates. Time to move on …..

Now things are settling down in my world were I am able to be in the position to get out again as it has been too long. So since beginning of this month, I have had the time and opportunity to get out but hey ho, nothing doing! As mentioned before, I have kept in contact with some girls and was thinking that at last we could meet up but attempting to think about let alone arranging a meeting is proving difficult to say the least. Part of the reason, lack of communication or when there is, it is slow in receiving. I accept we all have our own lives to lead and being who we are does come secondary but I was really hoping I would of been out by now!

As I have previously mentioned on a few occasions, I do not enjoy going out on my own, there is no fun in that but I know other girls will say otherwise. Going out on speculation has never done it for me and always feel let down afterwards! Currently, I feel a little sceptical about the future as I have been down this path many times before where things have been said, yes girls say we should meet but when push comes to shove, it does not happen and it has been all a waste of time. I just cannot go through that all again, I will be extremely unhappy and annoyed if it happens were I doubt it will do my mental well being any good.

On the positive side, currently next month could be when things will happen as there are possibilities of getting out at least twice with two girls but as yet no definite dates made. There is still time to make those arrangements so fingers cross but I do have some nice dresses for starters I would like to wear rather than them remain hanging up in the wardrobes. Mmmm it will be novel getting ready to go out as it has been a while. Will I remember the routine and what to do again, especially when it comes to make up etc. Could it take all day to get ready and then too late to go out! Will have to wait and find out in due course. 

The other thing that comes into the equation when going out, is where and when during the day. With the exception of one daylight outing in September last year, it been well over two years since I have been out especially in the evening, therefore you got to ask the question, what changes have there been since then especially in places like the Manchester Village etc. Are the old haunts still available or have they been replaced or even disappeared all together? In some ways, it will be starting fresh again, you know the unknown and take it as it comes to see what happens. Also, not been out as such, to attempt to restore your confidence and manners once again, clearly I need faith in myself once again and hopefully everything else will follow. Yes the doubts are there but must face upto them otherwise I end up like countless girls, never get out and remain in the closet for ever! Nah I can’t do with that! 

Well that is enough for now and just say a very belated happy new year to all. xx

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